Fantasy Football Team Names

Fantasy Football Team Names

By Scott Pagel (4for4 Scout), last update Sep 29, 2017

Scott Pagel's picture

Scott Pagel is Sports Editor for the Bethlehem Press and has covered Philadelphia Eagles training camp since 1997. Scott has played fantasy football since the 90s and has been contributing at 4for4 since 2005.

Follow Scott Pagel on Twitter: @4for4_Scott.

Now that we've reached the summer season, it’s time to start thinking about fantasy football. This is especially true if your local baseball team, the Phillies for example, have been out of the playoff race since about April 30 – there just isn’t much to think about when it comes to sports right now for me.

NFL training camps are quickly approaching and soon 4for4.com will be the hotspot to get every little tidbit of information that will make your draft day selections a piece of cake.

But, the fact is, there isn’t much you can control about your fantasy football team at this point this summer. The one thing you CAN is probably something that hasn’t even crossed your mind yet. Thinking about it now, though, may just save you some headache and pressure when the time comes to make one of your biggest fantasy decisions of the season – your team name.

Why You Should Think of a Name Now

OK, maybe I’m being dramatic. But, if you’re one of those owners who loves to come up with something clever instead of Team Bill or The Crushers, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

Thinking up a gutsy, funny, or clever team name now can definitely save you some headaches a few weeks from now. Waiting until the day you sign up for your account and staring blankly at the team name section, wondering what to fill in, can be stressful. Checking out the clever names your opponents have already decided on can make you feel the pressure to come up with something better right on the spot.

What Makes a Good Fantasy Team Name?

So what makes for a good team name that will draw comments, laughter and even awe from your friends and league mates?

Well, that’s certainly up to each owner, and even the type of owners in your league. For me, I like vile, disgusting and perverted – something my wife would cringe at. Hopefully this article will give you a good head start as far as choosing something that will get you noticed. Then it’s just a matter of backing it up on the proverbial fantasy football field beginning in September.

When I was approached about coming up with some names for an article, I was told to “keep it PG-13.” For me, that’s a challenge in itself. I don’t want to say I’m a pervert or immature … but I kind of am.

Now, one way to go is pick something that’s in the news and topical. Any team name that cleverly uses a player’s name can always be funny – and these happen to be my favorites.

Some names are pretty easy targets. Tony Romo for example – but, well, I can’t really print a lot of the names I’ve come across using him. Players who have Wood, Johnson or Peterson in their name will probably be deleted by my editor, so I won’t even bother (but they still make me giggle). In fact, I can’t wait to see which names get left in this piece when it finally goes live…

A bunch of the names below have come from Internet searches, others were names I’ve seen in leagues I play in, and still others I came up with in the time of my searches where certain topics just sparked my mind.

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Politically-Themed Team Names

Last year, I thought some political team names would be a great topic. It’s one of my least favorite topics as each day passes, but, it’s a great way to annoy your leaguemates and that’s what I’m all about. It’s something they’ll have to see every time they log on and it may frustrate them with anger to the point it affects their fantasy decision making. It may sound evil, but I just call it being a jerk, and it’s typical of my leagues with my friends.

  • Jordy, I hope there are tapes – thanks Wade Z
  • Russian for a TD
  • Putin it in the End Zone
  • Mal-Comey Floyd, FBI Director
  • VP Mike sPencer Ware
  • Blake News
  • Build the Wall-ace
  • Lady and the Trump
  • Make AmariCarr Great Again
  • DeMarco Rubio
  • #NotMyFournette

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Alcohol-Themed Team Names

This is probably one of my favorite topics.

  • Miller Genuine Draft Picks
  • Ginn and Tonic
  • Fozzy Navel
  • Donald ScrewDriver
  • JJ Shockley Top
  • MouthFeely (my favoirte craft beer term)
  • Barkley Wine
  • Ian RapaPorter
  • CJ Pilsner
  • India Pale B-ail-ley
  • Indy Pale Ale
  • DeAndre HOPS-kins
  • Kraft Beer
  • Shandy Reid
  • Derek Carr Bomb
  • BaCarrdi Rum
  • Long Island Iced Montee

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Film/TV-Themed Team Names

Movies and TV shows are an endless possibility for funny names just between one-liners and titles. This list could go on and on, so I tried to narrow it down to the more clever and popular ones:

  • Dude, Where's My Carr - Trenton T.
  • Duke Johnson of Hazzard
  • Frankly, Ameer, I Don't Give a Damn
  • Dak to the Future
  • Dalvin and the Chipmunks
  • Alvin and the Art Monks
  • Delanie Walker, Titans Ranger
  • I Pitta the Fool
  • Roddy White and 7 Dwarfs
  • Forgetting Brandon Marshall
  • Forte Year Old Virgin
  • Yippee Ki Yay Justin Tucker
  • Showin’ Her my TO Face
  • Final Dez-tination
  • A Rivers Runs Through It
  • Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood
  • The Big Gronkowski
  • Teenage Mutant Ninja Bortles
  • Kissing Suzy Kolber
  • Saved by Odell
  • The Tannehills Have Eyes
  • The Blair Walsh Project
  • Revis and Butthead
  • Demaryius Thomas and Friends
  • One Crabtree Hill
  • No Suh for You
  • Saved by the Bell

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Music-Themed Team Names

This is another endless possibility between titles and lyrics:

  • Just What I Sneaded It
  • Baby Got Dak
  • We Will, We Wilfork You
  • Let Me See You Tootie Sproles
  • Enter Sandersman
  • Just Mike Vick in a Box
  • Fleener Than a Junkyard Dog
  • Hooked on a Thielen
  • Dion Lewis and the News
  • Let’s Get PhysZekiel
  • Little Red Fournette
  • ABC, East as RG3
  • Every Day I’m Russell’n
  • Flutie and the Blowfish
  • Straight Outta Tomlin
  • Boy Named Suh
  • Runaround Suh
  • Le’Veon a Prayer
  • Le’Veon my Wayward Son
  • LeVeon Let Die
  • For Whom the Bell Tolls
  • You Got a Fast Carr
  • Hump-Tebow Dance
  • You Down with ODB (Jamaal Know Me)
  • You Down with JPP
  • Flacco Seagulls
  • Run DMC
  • MendenHall & Oates
  • Belicheck Yourself before you Wreck Yourself
  • Somewhere over the Dwayne Bowe
  • Drew Brees Makes Me Feel Fine
  • Troubled Bridgewaters
  • Rage Against Vereen
  • Counting Crowells
  • Welcome to the Chung-le
  • Coop Dogg
  • Julio Think You Are
  • Julio Let the Dogs Out
  • Stairway to Evans
  • Knockin' on Evans Door
  • Wentz, Twice, Three Times a Lady
  • Montee Can't Buy You Love
  • Red Hot Julius Peppers
  • It's Wayning Men
  • Hotel, Odell, Holiday Inn
  • Chris Ebony and Ivory
  • Rock n' Sproles
  • Russell and Flo
  • Jamaal About That Base
  • Me and Julio (Ask your dad about this down by the schoolyard)

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Random Team Names with No Theme Whatsoever

Here are a bunch of just random names that cover a wide range of topics. For the record, this is where I would have entered the more perverted R or X rated names:

  • Krispy Kareem - Thomas B
  • P90XXXL - Thomas B (Lacy reference)
  • Ty Reek Havoc - Thomas B
  • Ertz 2 Jones 4 Brady - Jon W
  • Deez Lutz - Doug B.
  • Levine Intervention - Scott S.
  • Mosley I Drink Urban and Water - Scott S.
  • Leave the Run, Takek the Haloti - Scott S.
  • Forte Shadys of Jay - Louis C.
  • Cutler's Last Stand - twblaylock
  • I'm a Man, I'm Forte! - twblaylock
  • Can You Diggs It?
  • Rawls Royce
  • It's Too Late to Say Amari
  • Roethlisberger Helper
  • Chronic Masterdeflator
  • Mariota Had a Little Lamb
  • Joique-ing Goff
  • Devonta Make Out?
  • Landry Service
  • No Days Goff - Carl S
  • In Scottland They Call if Goff - Carl S
  • Busted Four-knee-tte - Jonathan W
  • Bill I think You Betta Check - Ryan S
  • Russell, Wilson, Spalding - 1 Ball That's All - Ryan S
  • Not so Lucky Whitehead - Ryan S
  • Bless Them if They Snead - Ryan S
  • Thomas, Your Rawls are Showing - Ryan S
  • Doug's not a Baldwin Brother - Ryan S
  • Antonio's Brown Rice - Ryan S
  • Big Ben and his Little Friend - Ryan S
  • I said Goodell Sir! - Ryan S
  • Ah Suck a Zeke - Ryan S
  • HoRunninBlingLords - John B
  • Eddieable Lacy Panties – Dax L
  • Theo Riddickal Physics – Jeff R
  • Cruz’in for a Bruz’in – Greg S
  • Run DRC – Greg S.
  • Bend over and Cough-lin – Greg S
  • Vernon Down the House – Greg S
  • I’d love a BJ Goodson – Greg S
  • Kaeptain America – Jon J
  • AP’s Day Care
  • Storm Cooper
  • Ellington Coat Factory
  • Wentz Upon a Time
  • How about Dak?
  • Zeke and Destroy
  • Jacking Goff to Gurley Pics
  • Tannesaurus Rex
  • Elementary My Dear Watkins
  • Need for Snead
  • Mind Reeder
  • Carrted off the Field
  • You’re not Gurden ‘Nuff
  • Frosted Flaccos
  • You Winston, You Lose Some
  • Fourth and Lynches
  • Amari 2600
  • Amari 7800
  • Dak Dak Goose
  • Shake it Goff
  • It Ertz when Eifert
  • It Ertz when I Pee
  • It Hurns when I Pee
  • Boykin My Cousins
  • Boykin Your Cousins – may not want to brag about the one above…
  • Single and Boykin again
  • Wilfork on First Date
  • Turn Your Head and Coughlin
  • Hyde and Seek
  • Erect Decker
  • Peeping Tomlinson
  • Irritable Bowles Syndrome
  • Golden Tate Warriors
  • My Poop is Ronnie Brown
  • Ima Succop
  • DeMarco DePolo
  • Guys Never Read the Manuel
  • Rex, Suggs and Gronk n Roll
  • The Cutler Did It
  • Rudolph the Redzone Reindeer
  • Forte Inch Didka
  • Tebows Before ... [you know - Ed.]
  • Goff Balls
  • WD-Forte
  • Drinkin' Fortes
  • Eat, Drink and D. Murray
  • JJ S.W.A.T.T. Team
  • Wham! Bam! Thank You Cam!
  • InstaJimmy Graham
  • Ladies and Edelman
  • Stafford Infection
  • Pitchin' a Trent
  • Favre Dollar Footlong
  • Ingram Toenails
  • Dez Dispencer
  • Tootie Sproles
  • Super Mariota Bros.
  • Breesus, King of the Drews
  • Adam Shefter's Source
  • The Jolly Rodgers
  • Game, Forsett, Match
  • Grilled Brees Sandwhich
  • Bye Week
  • BortlesHasLacyRawlBrownTate - thanks John D.
  • BroJay Pimpson - thanks Desstarr N.
  • Suh-icide Squad - thanks Desstarr N.
  • Kickers Lives Matter - thanks Michael T.
  • Weeden Gordon's Pee
  • Hyde and Zeke - thanks Aaron K.
  • Brees Nuts - thanks Aaron K.
  • Fleenerschnitzel - thanks Aaron K.
  • 5 Fleener Dez Punch - thanks Aaron K.
  • Hyde ya Kids, Hyde ya Wife - thanks Aaron K.
  • Reed Between the Lines - thanks CJ S.

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Team Names For the Ladies

I also can’t forget about all of the female owners out there. All girls like chick flicks and soap operas, right?? I hate to admit this, but I’ve seen a lot of romantic comedies in my day, so when I looked at a list of the top movies in that category (which has probably never been searched by any other guy but me), it was a goldmine for team names:

  • Every Kiss Begins with Clay
  • Show you my TDs
  • Breaston Plants
  • 50 Shades of Jonas Gray
  • Forte Shades of Gray
  • Boldin the Beautiful
  • I Got a Tight End – there is nothing wrong with bragging, it may even be a distraction…
  • Wilfork For Tickets
  • Wilfork For (anything)
  • McCown or Never
  • I Touchdown There
  • Multiple Scoregasms
  • Darrel Young and the Restless
  • Ron Daynes of our Lives
  • Jamaal My Children
  • Witten in the Stars
  • Warren Moonstruck
  • Romo and Michele’s High School Reunion
  • 10 Things HeHateMe about You
  • Marvin Jones’s Diary
  • 13 Going on Forte
  • (Anything with Gurley)
  • Victorious Secret
  • Multiple Goregasms

We would love to hear some of your favorite, (printable) names and we can even add them to our list as the season goes on. You can email them to me at scott@4for4.com.

Filed Under:
Preseason
,
2017

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